Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
someone owes me an orgasm
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
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