Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
