the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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