I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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