I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
my liver is dry heaving
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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