so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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