I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
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