so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
