Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese. (717): Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days? http://tfl.nu/n2pa
  Replies (6) Good night (3435) Bad night (629)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick http://tfl.nu/1qrd
  Replies (32) Good night (2930) Bad night (867)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm. http://tfl.nu/dqxm
  Replies (12) Good night (4352) Bad night (774)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that. http://tfl.nu/ssua
  Replies (14) Good night (4065) Bad night (819)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove. http://tfl.nu/qfpc
  Replies (11) Good night (4240) Bad night (1208)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn. http://tfl.nu/9axz
  Replies (30) Good night (7137) Bad night (1129)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...

  (1-479): View more from Arkansas

  I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club... (1-479): I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma http://tfl.nu/vhqd
  Replies (23) Good night (935) Bad night (3451)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze http://tfl.nu/3a8k
  Replies (6) Good night (2717) Bad night (1129)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (270): Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house. http://tfl.nu/zb8n
  Replies (8) Good night (2433) Bad night (1023)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer http://tfl.nu/5k0a
  Replies (2) Good night (405) Bad night (804)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere. http://tfl.nu/z8sw
  Replies (5) Good night (626) Bad night (1172)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  That boy needs some memories to take back home with him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): That boy needs some memories to take back home with him http://tfl.nu/bmt8
  Replies (4) Good night (1150) Bad night (343)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her" http://tfl.nu/6lbz
  Replies (5) Good night (686) Bad night (346)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities? http://tfl.nu/uepx
  Replies (4) Good night (1014) Bad night (388)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent. http://tfl.nu/up93
  Replies (5) Good night (700) Bad night (195)

Randomize