plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Randomize
