i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
