I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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