her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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