I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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