Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
