So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
