I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
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