you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize