I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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