I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Randomize
