Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
