Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(520): View more from Arizona

I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level

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(985): View more from Louisiana

the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.

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(912): View more from Georgia

I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(919): View more from North Carolina

It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.

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(949): View more from California

Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke

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(785): View more from Kansas

Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."

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(+61): View more from Australia

He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice

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(951): View more from California

Hows your mom

(626): View more from California

Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk

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