omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Found your dick twin last night
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize