she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize