i just had sex bonerless
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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