i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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