Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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