This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
