maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
