I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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