There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
soo... how was my night?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
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