i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
