i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
