and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
