I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
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