Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Randomize
