real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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