I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
time to smoke my breakfast
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize