One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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