Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Randomize