More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
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