Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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