i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
false alarm, still single
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
