There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
