i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
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I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
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You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad