She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
