I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
my nose is crying tears of wow.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
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