Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Your cock deserves a montage
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
