Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Houston, we have a squirter
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
