she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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