My brain says no but my pants say off.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Randomize
