My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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